Saturday, August 9, 2008
Thursday's & Friday's Combined SUCK
BANKS and MAIL
These two ancient institutions never get called out for being pathetic, lazy pieces of shit. I'm not afraid of you. I don't care that you've both stood the test of time, even though more modern and efficient replacements have already been created and are widely used.
Banks and mail suck because they operate on a "fuck the world" schedule. Want to deposit money after 5PM on a weekday? Fuck you, come back tomorrow. What if it's Friday? Oh, well then come back Saturday, but make sure it's before 12PM, otherwise, we'll be closed. Don't even bother coming in on Sunday, no one needs money that day, even though that's when everybody goes shopping. The mail offers a similar policy: sorry, you're not getting shit or sending shit on Sunday. We're going to church. All. Day. We don't have time to deliver you anything on Sunday...you know, when you're most likely sitting around, waiting till Monday to get your stuff.
I do not understand these lazy bastards. At least stay open till like 8 or 9, banks, and be open on Sunday. All retail stores are, so why not you guys? And mail, really? Is it that hard to deliver stuff on Sundays?
Clearly banks and the mail system have entered some sort of agreement with the Catholic Church to not operate on Sundays. There is no other explanation (except the real explanation, which I am completely ignoring, that no corporations operate on weekends). Here's why:
Everyone's List of Stuff to Do on Sundays:
Fuck, it's Sunday, the bank's closed. Oh well, I guess I'll go get the mail and drop off this letter that must be sent and received today. DAMNIT, it's Sunday; no mail! Now I have nothing to do. I guess I'll go to church... man, that was pretty boring. That whole spilling seed thing was kind of interesting though, I mean, I've never really thought about it like that... now I don't really feel like jerking off anymore.
See? This is such an obvious conclusion to reach.
These two ancient institutions never get called out for being pathetic, lazy pieces of shit. I'm not afraid of you. I don't care that you've both stood the test of time, even though more modern and efficient replacements have already been created and are widely used.
Banks and mail suck because they operate on a "fuck the world" schedule. Want to deposit money after 5PM on a weekday? Fuck you, come back tomorrow. What if it's Friday? Oh, well then come back Saturday, but make sure it's before 12PM, otherwise, we'll be closed. Don't even bother coming in on Sunday, no one needs money that day, even though that's when everybody goes shopping. The mail offers a similar policy: sorry, you're not getting shit or sending shit on Sunday. We're going to church. All. Day. We don't have time to deliver you anything on Sunday...you know, when you're most likely sitting around, waiting till Monday to get your stuff.
I do not understand these lazy bastards. At least stay open till like 8 or 9, banks, and be open on Sunday. All retail stores are, so why not you guys? And mail, really? Is it that hard to deliver stuff on Sundays?
Clearly banks and the mail system have entered some sort of agreement with the Catholic Church to not operate on Sundays. There is no other explanation (except the real explanation, which I am completely ignoring, that no corporations operate on weekends). Here's why:
Everyone's List of Stuff to Do on Sundays:
- deposit money at the bank
- send and receive mail
- blow off church
- jerk off
Fuck, it's Sunday, the bank's closed. Oh well, I guess I'll go get the mail and drop off this letter that must be sent and received today. DAMNIT, it's Sunday; no mail! Now I have nothing to do. I guess I'll go to church... man, that was pretty boring. That whole spilling seed thing was kind of interesting though, I mean, I've never really thought about it like that... now I don't really feel like jerking off anymore.
See? This is such an obvious conclusion to reach.
# posted by Joey : 5:57 AM
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